Here I come..

I'm going to Kansas City on WEdnesday. I know what is in your head now--that song. That song--I'm going to Kansas City, kansas city here I come--goes through my head constantly as of late. What we need in this town is a song like that, something not good, just catchy. We need a goddamn jingle and the visitors bureu(speeled wrong but you know what I mean, theres an a somewhere) needs to worry about the jingle before everything else. Build the city around the jingle if you have to, but you need the jingle. You need people to get excited that they are coming here. Instead of, "Aw jeez, I'm goin' to Rockford" it should be " Goddamn happy sunshine nothiing can stop me from enjoying true happiness now that I am on my way to Rocccckkfffooorddd!!!" Right, I am right, Get on it before I do hustler.
Thank you for your support,
Rick Cork

So what....

There is a time in every man's life where he must consider his net worth. What is the value of me living here on this planet one second longer. What does the world gain by having me here doing whatever it is that I do? What do I gain by living in this world here? What have I accomplished and how has the world changed by having me as a tenant? Will stock in the world go up or done if all of a sudden I am no longer here to perform my functions in it? The smaller questions that make up the bigger questions, those are the ones we as individuals can fuck with. We cannot wrap our head around the big question, we cannot--or at least we should not be able to--eat an entire Whopper in one bite, but one bite at a time eventually it will be consumed and, well that's a bad example because: I have never eaten a Whopper, and I have never heard of anyone walking away from a Burger King with any more cosmic knowledge than what they entered with, so never mind bad analogy or whatever.
So do I think the world has benefited from me being here, in some ways yes, I do believe I make other people's lives more pleasant if even for just a slight second. Have I benefited from being here, yes I've met many wonderful people who have helped me to understand the world around me in a much more deep and profound way than I ever would have alone. THe thing is I do not beleive either I or the world at large are really taking advantage of what we really have here. WE are bound to benefit in a much larger way than we are currently doing, we can not fully reap the rewards because we have not put as much effort into sowing the seed my friends. You get to take away only what you put in, reap what you sow motherfucker, Reap WHAT YOU SOW. So where do we go from here, onward and upward, well that goes without saying, but where else. Sideways my friends, sideways, and upside down and at an angle to the left. Every one is going onward and upwards, thing of all the mental real estate available in backwards and downwards, or sideways and inverted, or something.
Fuck yes my friends we are going to tear the heads off these un-believers, there is something special happening my friends, and like it or not we are all a part of it. There is no for or against, just a fucking part of, period.
Thank you for your support,
Rick Cork
(If this made any sense to you please contact me at theguywiththethings@hotmail.com, I have some questions I would like to ask you, I don't really understand it all, or at all, I just wrote it)

Hugh Hefner

Did you know the first issue of Playboy was published in Rochelle Illinois? Well it was and I know this because I read a history of the beginning of Playboy Magazine in the Fortieth anniversary issue; and to be honest it inspired me. Hugh Hefner put everything he had on the line to get out what his vision of a mens magazine should be. He went out and preached to the masses his philosophy and they believed in him enough to invest in what is now a national institiution. Some even went in and bought stock in an unknown company at a dollar a share. Twenty years later when the stock went public many of those original investors became millionares. Valued at $750,ooo for every 100 shares that is a hell of a payoff. I am asking you people to have that same sort of faith in me when I get my act together and put out what I believe a magazine for weirdos should be. I want my vision on every coffee table of every misfit and ne'er-do-well in America and the civilized world, and two copies on the floor of every hut in the uncivilized world. I have something to say dammit, and I just have to figure out what the hell it is, put it in a nice package, and put it out there to be consumed by the hungered masses. All in good time my friends.
By the by, on Friday I am taping an episode of Rick Cork's Super Happy Fun Hour, this will just be the pilot in what will one day become an institution, or maybe I'm just doing my friend Dave a favor. Either way wish me luck, and I wish you luck in whatever it is you decide to do with your fucking life my friend.
Thank you for your support,
Rick Cork

...............................................

I have nothing to say.

And neither do you.

What would happen if we shut our fucking mouths every once in a while?

Why don't you try it asshole.

Thank you for your support,
Rick Cork